SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

I don’t like putting political stuff up here, but since I’m in no condition to write anything original or coherent and his presidency is soon ending (along with opportunity for comedy about his presidency) here are 50 funny quotes from George W.

Rodrigue Tremblay, a professor emeritus of economics at the University of Montreal and a frequent contributor to Global Research, can be credited for compiling these verbal slips. He’s also the author of the book, ‘The New American Empire,’ for anyone who’s into that kind of stuff.

A man lost in his geography:

1 — “We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a
firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.”
George W. Bush

2 –”It’s time for the human race to enter the solar system.”
George W. Bush

3 — “The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.”
George W. Bush

A man lost in his logic:

4 — “It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it. “
George W. Bush

5 — “Families is where our nation finds hope, where wings take dream.”
George W. Bush

6 — “These people are trying to shake the will of the Iraqi citizens, and they want us to leave…I think the world would be better off if we did leave…”
George W. Bush

7 — “I know how hard it is for you to put food ON your family.”
George W. Bush

8 –”If we don’t succeed, we run the risk of failure.”
George W. Bush

9 — “Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never
stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither
do we.”
George W. Bush

10 - “Well, I think if you say you’re going to do something and don’t do it, that’s trustworthiness.
George W. Bush

A man lost in space:

11 - “For NASA, space is still a high priority.”
George W. Bush

A MAN WITH HEAVEN ON HIS SIDE:

12 - “I believe God wants me to be president.”
George W. Bush

13 - [I was] “chosen by the grace of God to lead at that moment.”
Ge orge W. Bush

14 - “God told me to strike at al-Qaeda and I struck them, and then he
instructed me to strike at Saddam, which I did, and now I am determined to
solve the problem in the Middle East.”
George W. Bush

15 - “I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn’t do my job.”
George W. Bush

A man lost in his vocabulary:

16 - “Quite frankly, teachers are the only profession that teach our children.”
George W. Bush

17 - “The problem with the French is that they don’t have a word for ‘entrepreneur.’”
George W. Bush

18 - “One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is, ‘to be prepared.’”
George W. Bush

19 - ‘There’s an old saying in Tennessee - I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee - that says, fool me once, shame on - shame on you. Fool me – you can’t get fooled again.’
George W. Bush

Thoughts coming straight from George Orwell’s ‘1984′:

20 - “Iraq and Afghanistan…are now democracies and they are allies in the cause of freedom and peace.”
George W. Bush

21 - “Ariel Sharon … is a man of courage and a man of peace.”
George W. Bush

22 - “See, in my line of work you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda.”
George W. Bush

THE DECEIVING PACIFIST:

23 - “I just want you to know that when we talk about war, we’re really talking about peace.”
George W. Bush

24 - “This notion that the United States is getting ready to attack Iran is simply ridiculous. And having said that, all options are on the table.”
George W. Bush

25 - “Free nations don’t develop weapons of mass destruction.”
George W. Bush

26 - “Governments accountable to the voters focus on building roads and
schools - not weapons of mass destruction. ” (N.B. The U.S. has 10,000
nuclear weapons)
George W. Bush

A Theologian:

27 - “Islam, as practiced by the vast majority of people, is a peaceful religion.”
George W. Bush

28 - “The Islam that we know is a faith devoted to the worship of one God, as revealed through The Holy Qur’an. It teaches the value and the importance of charity, mercy, and peace.”
George W. Bush

A Flip-Flopper:

29 - “I favor leaving up to a woman and her doctor the abortion question.”
George W. Bush

30 -”I am pro-life.”
George W. Bush

31 - “The most important thing is for us to find Osama bin Laden. It is our number one priority and we will not rest until we find him.”
George W. Bush

32- “I don’t know where Osama bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don’t care. It’s not that important. It’s not our priority.”
George W. Bush

33 - “We found the weapons of mass destruction. We found biological laboratories …for those who say we haven’t found the banned manufacturing devices or banned weapons, they’re wrong, we found them.”
George W. Bush

A forecaster of things to come:

34 - “Oh, no, we’re not going to have any casualties [in Iraq].”
George W. Bush

35 - “We are ready for any unforeseen event that may or may not occur.”
George W. Bush

36 - “I have made good judgments in the past. I have made good judgments in
the future.”
George W. Bush

37 - “Many Iraqis can hear me tonight in a translated radio broadcast, and I
have a message for them: If we must begin a military campaign, it will be
directed against the lawless men who rule your country and not against you.”
George W. Bush, (speech of March 17, 2003)

38 - “To the “C” students, I say you too can be president of the United
States.”
George W. Bush

A astute observer:

39 - “A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.”
George W. Bush

40 - “Brownie (Michael Brown of FEMA), you’re doing a heck of a job.”
George W. Bush

A man and his environment:

41 - “I know that the human being and the fish can co-exist peacefully.”
George W. Bush

The double-talker:

42 - “There’s a lot of suffering in the Palestinian territory, because militant Hamas is trying to stop the advance of democracy.” (N.B. The Hamas government was elected)
George W. Bush

4 3 - “We look forward to analyzing and working with legislation that will make-I would hope-put a free press’s mind at ease that you’re not being denied information you shouldn’t see.”
George W. Bush

THE WOULD-BE DICTATOR:

44 - “In a time of war, the president must have the power he needs to make the tough decisions, including, if need be, the decision to grant himself even more power.”
George W. Bush

45 - “I’m also not very analytical. You know I don’t spend a lot of time thinking about myself, about why I do things.”
George W. Bush

46 - “If this were a dictatorship, it’d be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I’m the dictator.”
George W. Bush

47 - “I’m the commander - see, I don’t need to explain - I do not need to explain why I say things. That’s the interesting thing about being president.”
George W. Bush

48 - “I will not withdraw [from Iraq], even if Laura and Barney are the only ones supporting me.”
George W. Bush

49 - “I’m the decider, and I decide what’s best.”
George W. Bush

And, last but not least, CONSIDERING THE MESS IN IRAQ:

50 - “I don’t have the foggiest idea about what I think about international foreign policy.”
George W. Bush