SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

There are moments in pop culture history that will one day look back on and say, “WTF??” You know, they are those moments you never see coming. Those shocking Hollywood scandals, like when the world realized Lindsay Lohan was a lesbian, or when Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher began dating, or, even more shocking, when they got married! So I thought it might be fun to take a stroll down memory lane and remember some of the biggest WTF moments in pop culture history. . . .

• The death of Anna Nicole Smith. I was never a big fan of Anna Nicole. I actually didn’t really feel one way or the other about her. I didn’t often think of her. But I remember exactly where I was and what I was doing at the time of her death. It seemed like she came outta nowhere, but one day, all of a sudden, Anna Nicole Smith was everywhere. It seemed like there was always a new drama with her, and I found myself reading about her in the news every day. First  she married a very, very rich and very, very old man. Then that very rich old man died, and she found herself in a legal battle with his kids over his fortune. Then she gone and got herself knocked up. And then there was drama over who the father was. And then her son died. It was one thing after another with this woman, and I found myself coming to expect to read about her on PerezHilton.com every morning. It became a constant in my life. And then one day, she died. I was coming up the hallway stairs at work on my way back to my desk after a meeting on another floor in the building where I worked, and as I opened the door to our reception area, I found myself face-to-face with a news report on TV about the death of Anna Nicole. I remember actually feeling shocked. How could this woman be dead? Just yesterday I was reading about the latest STD she contracted. I felt sort of . . . empty. It’s hard to explain. I still don’t really understand it. I think Anna Nicole just had that type of crazy power over people.

• The seemingly sudden boom of reality TV. Remember when it was just you, me and MTV’s “The Real World”? I loved “The Real World” back when it was newish. Back in the days of guys like Pedro and Puc. Not these nut jobs they have on the show nowadays. Anyway, after that show became a hit, it seemed like new reality TV shows were popping up everywhere! And it’s only gotten worse over time. There is a reality show for every possible situation. Need a date? Want to shed those unwanted pounds? Looking for a multi-million dollar recording contract? Think you can dance? You name it, and there’s a reality show out there for it. And if there isn’t, there will be. Soon. Mark my words.

• Britney Spears’ meltdown. Remember the Britney Spears who pretended to be a virgin and dated Justin Timberlake? She was so sweet and adorable.

Flash forward ten years and look at what’s happened.

Clearly something went wrong down the line because sweet, virgin Brit Brit snapped and started doing crazy things like running off to Vegas to get married, having children with a back-up dancer, driving with her infant child on her lap and shaving her head. But, let’s give credit where it’s due. Brit has come a looong way, and it finally looks like she’s got her shit together, and I for one am happy for her and rooting for her all the way.

• The advent of sex tapes. Remember when Paris Hilton’s “One Night in Paris” sex tape hit the Internet? Remember how scandalous it was? Little did we know that that was only the beginning. Now everyone has a sex tape. In fact, it’s a very “in” thing to be doing right now. Starring in a sex tape means instant fame. Who really cared about Paris Hilton or Kim Kardashian before their most private moments were broadcast on the Internet for all the world to see? Now they each have their own reality television series, perfumes, clothing lines and god knows what else. It’s almost as if making a sex tape is good luck. Hmmmm. . . .

• Angelina Jolie. For those not old enough to remember, there was a time when Angelina Jolie was married to Billy Bob Thornton. And she wore a vile of his blood around her neck. And she made out with her own brother. Now she’s an Oscar winner, living with Brad Pitt, mother to six young children and a UNHCR Goodwill Ambassador. And she only just turned 34. Today! The woman puts Mother Teresa to shame. I hate her.

What do you think are some of the biggest WTF moments in pop culture history??