SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

Idiots Prepping for Australia

I’ve never been to Australia, but apparently a lot of morons are planning to go. These were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a great sense of humor (not to mention a low tolerance threshold for cretins!) Was just too good [...]

Continue reading...

Understanding Rap Through Mathematical Graphs

Stumbled across these the other day. Def check out jamphat to see them all. Below are my favorites (and by that I mean the ones I could understand):

Continue reading...

Search Terms Used To Locate Our Site

In case you were wondering the list of terms people could Google to come upon our lovely little SelfAbsorbed.me I figured I would give you a list, directly from Alexa site rankings below….enjoy. (these are actual terms you can search to locate us) Search Terms Driving Traffic Top keywords driving traffic to selfabsorbed.me from search engines. Updated monthly. [...]

Continue reading...

Freeze Frame!

Fun with animals. Just for today…. This fish is getting a wild ride. It could be malicious,  or it could be Six Flags nature style and the fish are in it for the fun. The legitimately terrifying. And what’s in the mouse’s mouth??? Hang on, little dude. Hang on! Aaaaw! On a rainy day, I want to be under [...]

Continue reading...

So An Actor Walks Into A Bar …

I  don’t know what paper it was, so if you ask me, I won’t be able to say, and I certainly don’t know what actor it was , so it isn’t worth even trying…but I do know one thing, reading that article was a waste of a good five minutes of my day. Some actor in [...]

Continue reading...

Wait, Are Killer Jokes Not Funny Anymore?

So the problem when two people spend too much time together, besides contracting an ugly case of meningitis, is the ability to not be able to distinguish your own personal jokes, from actual jokes…And by “actual” jokes, I do mean, things that “other people would laugh at.” In my boyfriend’s and I recent obsession [...]

Continue reading...

Introducing GACTAL: Episode 1.1

So it was only a matter of time before we decided we should take a stab at having our own original TV show. Something cute, funny, about the city and relationships so here you have it – Episode 1 of our new original online comedy GACTAL (Gwen and Clarissa Talk About Love). Enjoy below on [...]

Continue reading...

Funny Quotes from People Wiser Than Me

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself, ‘Lillian, you should have remained a virgin.’ - Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter) I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog: [...]

Continue reading...

The Philosophy of Ambiguity

Everyone go outside and enjoy the beautiful weather! Oh, you’re desk-bound suffering under florescent lighting, ticking days off your calender until you’re inevitably fired? Then briefly enjoy these…it’s the philosophy of ambiguity. I found it helped me laugh, even though everything that’s going on right now (and apparent insane global warming — it’s sixty degrees) [...]

Continue reading...

Fun with Retro Catalogues

This was sent to me and I had to post it immediately. Couldn’t find out from who or where it came, but whoever it is, thank you for this fabulous entertainment and all your hard work scanning! A JC Penney catalog from 1977. It’s not often blog fodder just falls in my lap, but holy hell [...]

Continue reading...