SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

Be Ugly

Consultation Needed! I’d like an answer, once and for all, about whether ‘make up’ or ‘no make up’ is more attractive. As part of my existential crises, I’ve stopped dressing up the way I used to. First, I nixed the heels. Then, I’ve nixed anything remotely tight or uncomfortable (how did I ever willingly wear things that [...]

Continue reading...

Burning Man Camp Boogies in New York

Just when you think you’ve seen all the weirdness NYC has to offer, you stumble across a party like this. Full Article Here…

Continue reading...

Home is Where the Heart Is (Question Mark)?

I actually saw and spent time with the entities that gave birth to me this weekend, something that doesn’t happen too often since accessing them is similar to trying to get a direct call into the Pope. They travel frequently. By frequently I mean like three and a half weeks out of the month. They [...]

Continue reading...

Agitated From Inside an Amtrak Train

So I’m sitting back and actually managing to relax on the absurdly overpriced express train from Boston back to New York when every travelers worst nightmare – two bleached-blonde children under the age of five are plopped down in front of me. The parents then notice I’m actually sitting at the four-person table and move [...]

Continue reading...

Burning Beautification Questions Answered

To my male readers, apologies in advance since this (like my faux purse article) might not interest you in that same burning, passionate way my usual writing about drunk women making fools of themselves does. I plan on partying in the Manhattan clubbing jungle this evening, and will hopefully procure some worthwhile stories. So I [...]

Continue reading...