SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

Everything You Need to Know Post-Thanksgiving Nightlife

Horrible that I have not written to you guys, but life has been taking a turn on Troy in so many ways. First, Friday I added a sexy and more upscale venue to my lineup: The Gates. Amazingly, I had 123 people there which is unbelievable..the doorman Frans said no one at The Gates has ever [...]

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An Eye Sore & Eye Candy

Please Join Us In Welcoming Frankie Knuckles The Godfather of House Music In a Rare Intimate Setting Thursday, February 28th, 11pm For Table Info & RSVP Please Call 212.463.0000 Pink Elephant 527 West 27th Street New York City www.pinkelephantclub.com I’ve been so busy taunting Kiss & Fly that I’ve completely neglected my precious first born, Pink Elephant. I actually haven’t even been there since [...]

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More Than Mildly Annoying, Hating & Make Me a Supermodel

1. This actually might go in the category of “more than mildly entertaining.” I somehow landed at Kiss and Fly on Saturday night and as I stood at a slightly elevated table surveying the crowd in a typical drunken cry for help, I was continually jabbed in the crotch by the flailing [...]

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Pink Scarves & TV Stars

I haven’t been to Pink in weeks. I was under the impression that I’d actually kicked my Thursday night addiction, yet somehow got dragged there (I blame the wine at dinner) for Wilhelmina’s Modeling Agency’s 40th Anniversary after party last night. The first thing I noticed as I approached the 27th street strip of debauchery [...]

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Sloppy with a capital ‘S’

My girl Bartok’s in town and after our group of friends consumed half a liter of sake and two bottles of champagne, our evening was off to a promising start. Around 2 A.M., after we all got bored of watching YouTube videos while inebriating ourselves, we decided it might be appropriate to detach our asses [...]

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Aghast at Abercrombie & Fitch

Friday I found myself in the unusual position of being above 14th street in the heart of enemy corporate territory – the 50s and Madison. I’d had to attend a meeting at 30 Rock, naturally scheduled at an ungodly early morning hour. The good news is that I was liberated by 11 a.m., and [...]

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Fashion Week My Ass

Here’s a question: Why is fashion week so painfully long? I just want my normal New York lifestyle to resume. During fashion week, all once-pleasant Manhattan activities are suddenly on steroids. And if it lasted just a one week as its title implies, maybe I could handle it, but fashion week is dangerously akin to [...]

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Photo Journalism At Its Best

Allow me to paraphrase a previous post that I wrote while in the beaches of Puglia:Southern Italy is the land of the man purse. In addition, some skewed fashion authority also approved Italian men wearing white (repeat, white) Speedos on the beach. Tiny Speedo bathing suits on men is already kind of a problem in [...]

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Sick Day & Euro Terror Levels

Last night I drank champagne like it was my job starting at 8 o’clock. A really BAD idea considering it was a Wednesday night. The night culminated at the center table (i.e. the table where you get wet and the performers pull you on stage and humiliate you) of The Box aka The Vortex. It’s [...]

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My First Celebrity Crush

I’ve never understood girls fawning over actors and musicians. I’m guess I’m just way too practical. Why waste your precious seductive thoughts and energy on someone who doesn’t even know you exist? On someone you have no hope of succeeding with? The superstar is unavailable, out of your league (sorry to be harsh), but seriously [...]

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