SelfAbsorbed.ME : ‘It’s Your Life, We Just Write it Funnier’

Why Tiger Woods’ Private Life is My Business

By now you’ve no doubt heard about about a little scandal involving Tiger Woods that keeps getting weirder with each passing day. First he was in a car accident, and somewhere along the way his wife beat him with a golf club (strange), and then we discovered she did this because he was cheating (understandable). [...]

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Another Cheesy Thanksgiving Post

Remember last Thanksgiving when I wrote a post about people who should be more thankful? Well, GOOD NEWS! This year I wrote another cheesy Thanksgiving-related post, but this year it’s all about me (something new and different). Many of my posts consists of me bitching about all the things that I don’t like about life, like [...]

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Hole in the Walls

One of the best/worst things about living in NYC is that as resident of the coolest city in the world, everyone you know wants to visit you all the time. That’s why after living here a few years you realize you’ve gone on that redic Statue of Liberty boat tour half a DOZEN times. But [...]

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My Secret Shame

Earlier this week, Boyfriend was watching a story about the torture debate on Keith Olbermann on MSNBC, and I was trying to tell him about Lindsay Lohan’s breakup with she-man Samantha Ronson that I was reading about on Perez Hilton. “This is really important,” he scolded. “You should care about this.” “Ummmmm I do freakin [...]

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A Job I Could Love

Lately, I’ve been wondering about work. Things like, does anyone really love their job? How can we learn to love our job? Why must we work? What does it all mean? Well, after thinking about it for about two days, I have no answers. I do however have some new, exciting potential career ideas for [...]

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My Dirty Dirty TV Secret

I watch The Bachelor. And I like it. I like it so much that I even stay up late after going out to hip NYC venues to ingest all two hours of its melodramatic rose giving. What’s wrong with me? I’ve blogged about The Bachelor before, specifically about doody Italian Prince Lorenzo (who didn’t even speak Italian, [...]

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Shows I’d Like to See on TV, Part 1

A lot of times when I’m at work I like to escape the tedium of my job by coming up with ideas for groundbreaking new shows with my friend, who I will refer to as “Glen Coco.” I think it’s safe to say that Glen Coco and I are the pioneering creative minds of our [...]

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Introducing the I’m Just Sayin’ Show

It’s blizzarding outside and if you made it into work, you’re probably wishing you were under a down comforter with some girlfriends enjoying steaming hot chocolate and Xanex while watching the snowfall idyllically from the warmth of your expensively heated apartment. Instead, you almost slid to your death five times this morning sidewalk-skiing to your [...]

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Me, Attempting to Watch ‘The City’

Yesterday I TiVoed and watched The City for the first time because a) I feel like I should be on the look out for myself since I might show up as an extra and b) because a musician friend of mine was supposed to have one of her songs featured in this episode. I’d say [...]

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Trapped in the Closet

OH MY GOD. What am I going to WEAR for New Years?!?! I love an excuse to wear something completely ridiculous, probably impractical. I’m really drawn to the trends that turn a practical piece of clothing or an accessory into something completely useless. My three favorite items rendered useless/impractical by fashion: 1) Headbands Well, yes, the [...]

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